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Blue are the hills that are far away. - Italian Proverb

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Summer vacation is a time when parents realize that teachers are grossly underpaid.

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When it thunders, the thief becomes honest. - Italian Proverb

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Fools for luck. - German Proverb

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The woman who thinks no man is good enough for her may be right.... But she is more often left.

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Work is not man's punishment. It is his reward and his strength and his pleasure. -George Sand

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A word of kindness is better than a fat pie. - Russian Proverb

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Fancy requires much, necessity but little. - German Proverb

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Thomas Fuller~ Many would be cowards if they had courage enough.

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Samuel Johnson~ I hate mankind for I think myself to be one of them and I know how bad I am.

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What is a moo hoo for a cow that fell into the thresher? Ground round!

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A domestic cats sense of smell is about fourteen times as strong as a hooman's.

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Reputation is what the world thinks a man is; character is what he really is. -Anonymous

The pan says to the pot: Keep off, or you'll smutch me. - Italian Proverb

A strong sense of duty can imprison you

What soft drink do pigs like best? Root beer.

Miguel de Cervantes~ When thou art at Rome do as they do at Rome.

Why is the old, decrepit horse named Flattery? Because it gets you nowhere!

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Every rose has its thorn. - Italian Proverb

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Thinking of where you are going, you forget whence you came. - Portuguese Proverb

Euripides~ Leave no stone unturned.

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Losers make promises they often break. Winners make commitments they always keep. -Denis Waitley

When there's a will, I want to be in it.

Flashlight: n. A torch that only works when you don't need it.

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He who is always drinking and stuffing, will in time become a ragamuffin. - German Proverb

Confucius~ The expectations of life depend upon diligence the mechanic that would perfect his work must first sharpen his tools.

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I'm comfortable being old... being black... being Jewish. - Billy Crystal

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What animals do you bring to bed? Your calves.

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To whom much is given, much is required. -John F Kennedy

Geoffrey Neighor~ Good food ends with good talk.

Religions are cults with more members.

Latvian Proverb~ A smiling face is half the meal.

John Harold~ Without trust words become the hollow sound of a wooden gong. With trust words become life itself.

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Gifts break (or dissolve) rocks. - Spanish Proverb

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To fall out of the frying-pan into the fire. - Italian Proverb

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He who does not repair his gutter has a whole house to repair. - Spanish Proverb

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Cicero~ Law stands mute in the midst of arms.

Francis Bacon~ By far the best proof is experience.

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe~ Divide and rule a sound motto. Unite and lead a better one.

He/She must have learned to whisper in a sawmill!

What do you get if you take your computer to an ice rink? A slipped disk.

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Thomas Hardy~ If a way to the better there be it lies in taking a full look at the worst.

Never let the bottom of your purse or of your mind be seen. - Italian Proverb

Margaret Elizabeth Sangster~ I thank You God in Heaven for friends.

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Real Live Preacher~ Memory is a giggling sprite and will not be tamed. She takes flight the moment the present becomes the past.

Entrepreneurs are the forgotten heroes of America.

Jonathan Swift~ May you live all the days of your life.

Francis Bacon~ They are ill discoverers that think there is no land when they can see nothing but sea.

What dog is always tired in London? An English sleep dog.

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He who hangs out a branch wants to sell his wine. - Spanish Proverb

I've run out of sick days, so I am calling in dead.

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A kitchen dog never was good for the chase. - Italian Proverb

They are able because they think they are able.

Latin Proverb~ A man is not where he lives but where he loves.

There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned by cats.

Can fat people go skinny-dipping?

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How many cashiers does it take to change a light bulb? Are you kidding? They won't even change a five dollar bill.

Dicky Barrett~ If it was an overnight success it was one long hard sleepless night.

Jewish Proverb~ What you dont see with your eyes dont invent with your mouth.

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A happy heart is better than a full purse. - Italian Proverb

Why did the chicken get sent off? For persistent fowl play!

Ludwig van Beethoven~ Music is a higher revelation than philosophy.

A woman's rule of thumb: If it has tires or testicles, you're going to have trouble with it.

Michael Brown~ The Human Spirit can never be paralyzed. If you are breathing you can dream.

Epictetus~ There are some things which men confess with ease and others with difficulty.

Once upon a time there were five apples Which was the cowboy? None - because they were all redskins.

Dorothy Law Nolte~ If a child lives with approval he learns to live with himself.

Q: Dad, why do the singers rock left and right while performing on stage? A: Because, son, it is more difficult to hit a moving target.

There is more disputing about the shell than the kernel. - German Proverb

All of us are God's creatures... just some are more creature than others.

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Women are necessary evils. - German Proverb

Never trust the advice of a man in difficulty. - Japanese Proverb

Q: What is the difference between a cello and a coffin? A: The coffin has the corpse on the inside.

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What do you do when a Chihuahua sneezes? Get a small hankie!

Timid dogs bark most. - German Proverb

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'Tis not for everyone to catch a salmon. - German Proverb

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Tallulah Bankhead~ Im as pure as the driven slush.

Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window. - Steve Wozniak

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It often requires more courage to dare to do right than to fear to do wrong. -Abraham Lincoln

If it were not for the belly, the back might wear gold. - Italian Proverb

I am a lucky man. -Christopher Reeve

Alessandro Pronzato~ The best way not to have people in your way is to let them into your heart.

Good manners and plenty of money will make my son a gentlemen. - Portuguese Proverb

Nuke the Whales.

It's more important to do the right thing than to do things right. -Peter Drucker

Harry S Truman~ Whenever you have an efficient government you have a dictatorship.

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